Man convinces himself that the only thing preventing him from a bigger squat is a bigger squat rack.

Longtime garage gym owner and self-described “fitness fanatic” Pete Johnson already has the biggest squat in his neighborhood, ‘Woodland Heights: A Gated Community.’ Neighbors report they often hear Johnson dropping weights and screaming obscenities in the early morning.

One local resident, affectionately known as Grandma Betty claimed, “I don’t know what he does in there, but it doesn’t really even look like he lifts.”

But, being the Woodland Heights Strongest Man isn’t enough for Johnson. He’s decided he wants to put more weight on his back while going up and down. However, he says his equipment has reached its limit.

“I know, I know, 315 LB is a massive squat, but I want more. My 2”x3” 11-gauge, 90” tall squat rack simply doesn’t cut it,” he told reporters while trying to shake his bolted to the ground, wall, and ceiling squat rack. “If I’m going to hit 255 LB for 5x5 like my coach wants, I’m going to need something bigger. Much bigger.”

Johnson claims if he can just get his Wife on board, he’ll be on the road to an even bigger squat. The rack he’s currently looking at is 103.75” tall and has eight 4”x4” 7-gauge steel uprights.

“The issue with this rack though is…” Johnson began to tell reporters, “I’m not sure if they’re going to come out with something that’s even bigger.”

At publishing time Johnson was still undecided about which squat rack to buy, so he decided to order a new barbell.

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